Processing and praying...

Wow. What a day. A day that has given me so much to think about...

This morning, as I and the rest of the worship team was finishing up rehearsal in preparation for services, we received word that four police officers had been shot and killed just minutes ago at a coffee shop just blocks from church. Four of them. As they were drinking coffee in front of their laptops, getting ready for a day's work. Thankfully, I didn't have to worry about Steve being a part of this - he was home with the kids. Even still, I was really shaken up. And in shock. This was just too close to home, both physically and figuratively. I called Steve right away, and also thought immediately of our very good friend who works for the department the officers were from. And thankfully again, our friend had not been working, either. Thank you, God, a hundred times over.

As the day has unfolded, Steve and I have received more details, and I have been able to process things at least a little bit, I'm at a place where I think I could write and write, just to get my thoughts and emotions out there. But I don't want to ramble. Maybe later, after I can really process more, I will say more, but I want my words to actually have a purpose.

So for now, I want to ask for prayer. Because in situations like this, what else can you do? Here are things I can think of to pray for in this situation:

-that the suspect/s would be caught, and quickly. There is little doubt that this person WILL be caught, but it needs to be as soon as possible - for the safety of the public, and for the safety of all local officers. Also, pray that when he is apprehended, there will be no more death. This person has nothing left to lose, and will not be afraid to kill again.
-for the local law enforcement community. For their safety, for sure. Also, for an extra dose of courage and vigilance as they work. And also for their hearts as they grieve the loss of a colleague, or even friend. Since Steve has entered the field, it has encouraged me to see what a close-knit community exists within law enforcement. And to lose a comrade, even if you didn't know them personally....
-for the two baristas and "few" customers at the coffee place at the time. Can you imagine? Can you even begin to imagine the scene...first fearing for their lives, watching the brutality, not being able to do a thing for the officers, and then the final scene? Those images will haunt them all their lives. Well, let's pray that they don't. My heart goes out to these witnesses.
-more than anything else, we can pray for their families. Between the four of them, they had nine kids. Seven kids now without daddies, and two without their mommy. Three spouses surely still in shock, but soon to be entrenched in unimaginable grief. Parents, siblings, close friends...all without their loved one. I can't even tell you how much my heart is breaking for them right now. Even this morning upon first hearing the news, of course I was thinking about Steve and the fact that he is in danger every day that he works. But my dominant care was for all of these people, about to be greeted by a person in uniform at their doorstep, giving them the news of the death of their loved one. I can't express my sadness for them.
-admittedly the most selfish prayer request of this list...for Steve's safety. Honestly, I've never really had great fear for Steve in his line of work. I'm not naive, and I know police work can be dangerous, but despite what it seems, police deaths are quite uncommon, and much more rare than, for example, construction deaths (his previous line of work). Beyond that, this is an area where, for whatever reason, I have no problem trusting God, and knowing that we are resting in His hands. I've just always had a peace about it...definitely from God. But now....like I said, today has given me much to think about. As I write this, Steve is at work, and the killer is still on the loose. I suppose I should be freaking out? Thankfully, I'm not...again, I feel the Lord's peace. But I am also consciously not allowing myself to think about all the "what if"s. Anyway, prayers for his safety are always appreciated.

Getting through two worship services while all of this was going on was not easy. It is really hard to genuinely and earnestly praise God in the midst of such evil and such pain. At the same time, it is in these times that lyrics come to life and pierce your heart. Words that spoke to me...

"You alone are Father
You alone are good
You alone are Savior
And You alone are God"

And the words that made me smile every time they were sung:

"And 'til I see You face to face and grace amazing takes me home I'll trust in You"


I've been checking in with the news periodically throughout the day, and in the time it has taken me to write this, things have happened. This from the local news... "Police searching for the person of interest in the Lakewood police shooting have surrounded a home in the city's Leschi neighborhood. Spokesman Jeff Kappel said the SWAT team surrounded the home around 8:45 p.m. after receiving a tip that (the bad guy) may be inside. Investigators on the scene said negotiators are trying to get the man inside to surrender." May this be the end. Even if it marks only the beginning of a long and difficult grieving process for four families.