It all started when I went in to retrieve a squealing but very stinky Jayna from her nap. Realizing that there were no wipes upstairs, I took her downstairs to get her changed (with, I might add, a very whiny, "I just woke up on the wrong side of the bed and nothing can make me happy" Travis in tow). So I laid Jayna on the ground, stripped her clothing since some of it was wet, and proceeded to undo the thingies (I can't for the life of me think of the right word here) on her diaper. Here's where everything thing went quickly downhill on a very steep slope.
I swear, in the 1/2 second it took to reach over and open the wipes container, Jayna reached down, grabbed her diaper, and pulled it directly on to her face, poop side down. With a look of sheer disgust/horror/urgency, she then flung it face down again, this time on the carpet. I should explain here that we're not talking the nice, solid poop that is relatively easy to clean up. We're talking....okay, you probably don't want the details. But you get the idea.
This all happened so quickly that I sat dumbfounded for what seemed like a minute. Do you ever have one of those times where somehow a hundred thoughts flow through your mind in what turns out to be only a matter of seconds? I didn't know where to start with cleaning things up. It was everywhere....her whole forehead and right cheek, her eyebrows, some of her hair...then when she put her hands in it, she smeared it on her belly, arms, legs...everywhere. Then there was the carpet. Again...everywhere. I'm ashamed to say that one of my thoughts was to first clean up the carpet, but that thought was quickly smothered by the reality that while I cleaned it up she would just be smearing more. So, after wiping some of the larger globs off her body, I carried her a foot in front of me to the kids' bathroom upstairs to get her into the bathtub.
Meanwhile, the whole time that I'm dealing with cleaning Jayna while she is screaming (not crying, screaming...hey, you would be, too, if your face was covered in poo), Travis is in the background whining about whatever he can think of. "Mommy, don't want to come downstairs". "Mommy, me thirsty". "Mommy, need a cup". "Mommy...mommy...mommy.....". It was constant, and incredibly grating on the nerves when the Jayna situation was obviously a bit of a higher priority.
Okay, so I get the bath started, put her in, cover her in soap, and scrub. And she's still screaming, louder by the minute. We're still trying to figure out ways to make her enjoy bathtime again....this ordeal definitely did not help. I really had to scrub. I finally get her clean, wrap her in the towel, and take her to the changing table. She's still screaming, Travis is still whining despite my telling him to stop, and I'm doing some serious deep breathing. And while I'm trying to wrestle her into a new diaper, Travis decides to slam a toy airplane into my ankle.
And that was it. I didn't even get mad, I just started crying. Partly because he really hurt me, but partly because that was the last straw. This situation was certainly stressful, but I had had a somewhat frustrating day to begin with, and I felt defeated.
But now, when Travis sees me crying, he covers his face with his hands and starts crying, too, saying in a hysterical voice "I'm sorry, Mommy, I'm sorry!" Can you picture it? All three of us, crying our little eyes out. And at this, I admit, I had to let out a small giggle.
Thankfully, the story does end. Travis bent down to kiss my ankle, apologized again after I told him that he hurt me, and Jayna settled down. And though I still smelled a hint of poo in parts of her hair, I was not about to put her (or myself) through another bath. Oh, and I spent a fair amount of time cleaning the carpet. We were thinking about having some of our carpets cleaned sometime next month...this event solidifies that plan!
Steve got home shortly after I had cleaned everything up, and I was still a bit disheveled. I told him the story and could see the smile forming, but he was kind enough to stifle his laughter (or at least most of it).
In the midst of it, this was one of those moments that makes me wonder if I could actually handle any more kids. It seems like the crazy stuff always has to happen all at once. But looking back, even I can't help but laugh a little bit. I suppose sometimes it is the laughter that keeps you going!